This game brought to you by Band Aid and the Gourd Growers Association of America

So, my lovely friend Tracy is getting married in October, and I'm helping to come up with games for the bachelorette party. In my research, I came upon the horrific-sounding Carve a Cucumber idea posted on bachelorette.com.

Directions: Give every guest a cucumber, zucchini, or squash and a knife.

I'm sorry - a knife? Is that really a smart idea? I have trouble with knives on my best days; I can't imagine actually carving for recreation. Add ten tipsy, knife-wielding women to that equation and it sounds like a recipe for disaster. I think this game is better suited to the "Christian Bachelorette Parties" web link I ignored in my research.

Give each person twenty minutes to carve their veggie into an accurate representation of a male member.

Or, maybe not.

After twenty minutes are up, the bride can judge them all.

You know, once the vegetables have been sufficiently exposed to air and had time to oxygenate. Nothing says suggestive like wilting phallic produce. Sexy!

This game also works well with Play-Do.

Information that would have been useful before that trip to the emergency room. And I imagine the souvenirs would last longer.


(Semi-relevant photo, theirs.)